Meet Gracie

Name: Gracie

AKA: Gracie-Ellen, Gracie Loo Hoo, Yoo Hoo, Buttzilla, Orsen (as in Wells), Bella Roo, Gracie-ella, Bitcherella, Boopsie-noodle, Jabba da Butt, The Alpha Bitch, Boo Boo Kitty

Weight: 12± of pure witch

Origins: Mamma was a stray ho that had me in the lobby of a hotel where a friend of Mommy & Daddy worked.  He convinced them they needed me after their beloved Puss (19-1/2 yrs) passed away.  I’ll never fill his claws, er, paws and I suspect that is what makes me such a witch.  I can’t help myself. The vet has told them it is because I am a torty (they don’t like me much there at the vet’s; I live up to the mean-face sticker on my chart).

Likes: Helping Mommy work, lying on mommy’s chest first thing in the morning (as close to her face as I can get), growling at the “other two”, food, food, food, prowling the perimeter of my back yard, belly dancing for Mommy when she scoops my box (Ok, it is more like rolling around, but she seems to like it), getting my butt smacked around (I’m a sick cat) and shower water.  Oh, and treats!  I have no dignity when it comes to them.

Dislikes: Everybody.  Except Mommy.  Sometimes.

Biggest adventure: Hmmm.. I don’t go far from my food dish & bed, but I have brought a few snakes in the house.  Surprisingly, Mommy does not like this.

Most distinctive quality: Extremely diminutive meow for such a full figured gal.  Boo-hooing arias over Stinky Baby (nearly decapitated stuffed mouse I’ve had since I was a mere kitten; I bring it to Mommy almost everyday). Orange dot right between my ears.

 

Meet Menace

Name: Menace

AKA: Min-Min Chin-Chin, Miss Legs, Cutie Patootie, Killer, The Brat, Mini (as in Mini-Me to Cry Baby), ChinnyRoo, Jingle Butt

Weight: 9 lbs. of lean mean killin’ machine

Origins: Was from one of the neighbor kitty’s litter (makes me related to Cry Baby somehow) and I decided to escape.  I parked my cute butt on Mommy & Daddy’s porch until they took me to the vet and had me fixed – because the toms in the ‘hood can be scary for a little gal like me – (even if I can kick their *ss)!

Likes: Leaving Mommy & Daddy previously-living presents like bullfrogs, squirrels, birds, moles, snakes, lizards, etc. under the patio rugs, stalking Cry Baby, peeking in Mommy’s studio window, snoozing the day away on my chaise lounge, or in my bowl when it’s cold and seeing how many times I can make Mommy open the door for me then let me out again.

Dislikes:  Thunder, other cats in my yard, offensive patio rugs (I must ball them up occasionally even if I have nothing to leave underneath), lawn mowers, and dogs. Gracie doesn’t bother me, she knows I’ll kick her fat *ss.

Biggest Adventure: Spent 5 nights,in the rain, on top of a 40 foot palm tree until a very distraught Mommy & Daddy found me.  The rescue was quite an event.

Most distinctive quality: Whiskey & cigarette Meow, heart-felt headbutts and a vibrating butt.

 

Meet Cry Baby

Name: Cry Baby

AKA: Chunky-Butt, Good Boy, Mr. Boy, The Beast, Beaster, Kitty-long legs, CB, Fraidy Cat

Weight: 18-20 lbs. of pure love

Origins: Belonged to neighbors but decided to keep visiting these folks.  They feed & love pretty good & there is peace.

Likes: Anything I can eat, ESPECIALLY popcorn which the prospect of makes me unusually obnoxious.  Prowling the wooded lot behind our house. Long brushies. A little “mat” time or chatchin’ a snooze on the couch. Sleeping on the chaise lounge – when Menace gives me a little space!

Dislikes: Being stalked by Menace (she’s sneaky), being harassed by Gracie, (I’m a lover, not a fighter) lawn mowers, thunder and dogs.

Biggest adventure: Let’s just say Mommy & Daddy were very surprised when I came home with a professionally stitched up leg after being missing for four months.  I’m not talkin’.  (I stick closer to home these days)

Most Distinctive Qualities:  Loud, snore-like grunt-purr, must slop most of water out of dish then stand in it as I drink from it (I can’t explain) and the ability to go limp as a drunken sailor when picked up.

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